In times of crisis — whether personal, societal, or global — many people notice a shift in how they think, feel, and relate to others. You may find yourself more anxious than usual, less trusting, emotionally overwhelmed or shut down, or feeling strangely disconnected from the people around you — even those you are closest to.
These reactions can feel confusing. Sometimes they feel disproportionate to the situation, and that confusion can bring shame or self-doubt on top of what is already a difficult experience. But from a psychological perspective, there is an important truth worth holding:
We are not only reacting to the situation itself. We are also responding through deeper, pre-existing patterns within us — patterns that were shaped long before the current crisis began. These patterns are known as schemas.
What Are Schemas?
Schemas are deeply rooted emotional and cognitive patterns that develop over time — often shaped by early experiences, relationships, and unmet emotional needs. They influence how we interpret events, how we feel in response to them, and how we behave in our relationships. Most of the time, they operate outside of our awareness. They feel like facts rather than patterns — like the way the world simply is, rather than one of many possible ways of seeing it.
In stable, predictable times, schemas may remain quietly in the background. You may not notice them at all. But in moments of stress, uncertainty, or threat, they become more active — rising to the surface with an urgency that can feel overwhelming, because they are drawing not only on the present situation but on every similar experience the mind has ever stored.
Why Crisis Can Feel Heavier Than It "Should"
When we face a difficult situation, our emotional reaction is not shaped by the present moment alone. It is also shaped by past emotional experiences, by old wounds or unmet needs that were never fully processed, and by internal beliefs about safety, trust, and connection that were formed long ago.
This is why a current event can feel overwhelming in a way that surprises us — deeply personal in ways we cannot fully explain, and difficult to regulate even when we are doing everything we can to manage it. Because what we are feeling is not only about what is happening now. It is also activating something that already exists within us — something the current situation has found and surfaced.
Common Schemas Activated During Crisis
While everyone's experience is unique, certain schemas tend to become more active during times of instability — especially those related to safety, trust, and belonging. Here are some of the most common:
Abandonment
A deep fear of losing people, stability, or a sense of safety. During crisis, this can show up as persistent worry about losing loved ones, a feeling that nothing is secure or predictable, or a constant sense that loss is imminent — even when there is no immediate evidence for it. The underlying belief often sounds something like: I might lose everything.
Mistrust and Abuse
A tendency to expect harm, betrayal, or ill intentions from others. This can manifest as increased suspicion, difficulty tolerating perspectives that differ from your own, or interpreting neutral behaviour as unsafe or threatening. The underlying belief: I cannot trust anyone.
Emotional Inhibition
Holding back emotions due to a learned expectation of judgment, rejection, or misunderstanding. You may notice difficulty expressing your thoughts or feelings, a sense that it is not safe to speak openly, or a growing emotional buildup with no clear outlet. The underlying belief: It is better not to say anything.
Social Isolation
A feeling of being fundamentally different, disconnected, or not fully belonging — even in the company of others who share your experience. This can look like withdrawing from people, feeling deeply misunderstood, or experiencing a kind of emotional distance that persists even in shared moments of difficulty. The underlying belief: No one really understands me.
Negativity and Pessimism
A focus on worst-case scenarios and an inability to hold space for positive outcomes. This often shows up as catastrophic thinking, difficulty imagining a future that is not painful, or a pervasive sense of hopelessness that colours everything. The underlying belief: Nothing will get better.
Emotional Deprivation
A belief that one's emotional needs will not be met — that care, attention, and understanding are things other people receive but not you. This often includes feeling unseen or unheard even when people are present, a deep loneliness that exists alongside connection, and difficulty expecting or accepting support. The underlying belief: No one is really there for me.
Why Awareness Matters
When schemas are activated, our reactions can feel intense and sometimes beyond our control. Without awareness of what is happening beneath the surface, we may blame ourselves for the intensity of our feelings, feel ashamed of reactions that seem "too much," or come to believe that something is fundamentally wrong with us.
But in reality, these responses are deeply human. They are shaped by our history — not just our present. Schemas originally develop as ways to help us cope and survive. They were adaptive once. The difficulty is that in current situations, they can sometimes intensify our distress rather than relieve it, because they are applying old solutions to new circumstances.
You Are Not Your Schemas
An important part of psychological growth is recognizing that these patterns are part of your experience — but they do not define you. When we begin to notice them, something shifts. We create space between what we feel and how we respond. Between our past and our present. Between our patterns and our choices.
And within that space, there is room for greater self-awareness, for emotional regulation, and for a kind of compassion toward ourselves that many of us were never taught to practise.
A Gentle Reminder
If you are feeling more overwhelmed, disconnected, or unsettled during difficult times than you think you "should" be — it may not only be the situation itself. It may be that deeper patterns within you have been activated by what is happening around you.
And rather than trying to push these experiences away or judge yourself for having them, you might begin with something simpler: noticing them, naming them, and being a little more compassionate with yourself as you carry them.
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If you are navigating stress, anxiety, or emotional overwhelm and would like a space to explore these patterns with clarity and care — in English or in Farsi — I would be glad to talk.
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